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My sordid life as a rock idol – Bingo’s Banana Splits shocker

My sordid life as a rock idol – Bingo’s Banana Splits shocker

It’s been over 40 years since the smash sixties rock group The Banana Splits rocked the charts and the airwaves with their infectious fire station menagerie sound. But now, drummer Bingo has rocked the music establishment with his revelations about the band’s shocking, sordid, secret life. “From the outside, we had it all,” said Bingo, […]

April 26th, 2010 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

World not realistic enough say reality show fans

World not realistic enough say reality show fans

Reviews from reality show fans suggest that the real world falls short of their expectations, and unless steps are taken quickly to improve the situation, they will give up on it. Cynthia Narwhal was inspired by the series The Apprentice to get a receptionist job at a real estate development company. But instead of intense […]

September 18th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

New Patrick Swayze joke in the works

New Patrick Swayze joke in the works

After the tragic death of Patrick Swayze, comedians are scrambling to celebrate the actor’s life by coming up with a joke for the occasion. A team from Harvard has been working on a joke for several months. They announced that they were very close to completing a joke. “Swayze was in the movie Ghost,” said […]

September 15th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

Death sentence for killer pedophile Tom Cruise

Death sentence for killer pedophile Tom Cruise

Tom Cruise faces death by lethal injection as his punishment for his role in the savage slayings of dozens of small children, if he ever commits this crime, which, so far, he hasn’t. The Nielsen Hypothetical Crimes Survey polled a large number of Americans to find out what they thought would be the most shocking […]

September 13th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

Bono’s U2 shot down over Russia

Bono’s U2 shot down over Russia

The band U2 has been shot down while flying over Russia. Lead singer Bono ejected from the plummeting pop group and parachuted to safety, but was subsequently captured by Russian troops. Bono has been interrogated and charged with espionage, but he denies the accusations. “I am just a simple Irish musician, traveling the world to […]

September 5th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

Marilyn Monroe must be shared, say men

Marilyn Monroe must be shared, say men

The Los Angeles widow who is selling a burial plot above the one occupied by Marilyn Monroe faces opposition from men, who say the beautiful, dead star should be shared. Herbert Hoops, America’s funeral-director-in-chief called the funeral plot sale “A disgusting travesty”. Said Hoops: “Every red-blooded American male enjoyed Marilyn’s sexy curves in life, and […]

August 17th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

Fifth Beatles to reunite

Fifth Beatles to reunite

George Martin, Pete Best, and Phil Spector have announced that the Fifth Beatles are to re-form. They plan a series of concerts across Europe and North America, featuring the band’s trademark record producing, drumming, singing, and murdering talents. A fourth Fifth Beatle, Stu Sutcliffe, who died in 1962, will be represented by his German photographer […]

August 11th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

SMACKDOWN! Who is the best Diarist? Anne Frank vs. Samuel Pepys

SMACKDOWN! Who is the best Diarist? Anne Frank vs. Samuel Pepys

Who is the best diarist – Samuel Pepys or Anne Frank? It’s been the subject of many a furious argument, bar room brawls, and even a murder. But now the decades-long debate may finally be over, thanks to research carried out by the Department of Pugilistic Semiotics at the University of Stockholm. Researchers used the […]

August 5th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

Clinton takes on North Korean military

Clinton takes on North Korean military

President Clinton has arrived in Pyongyang to rescue jailed US journalists Laura Ling and Euna Lee using “maximum force”. He has vowed to pay “a little visit” to North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. Clinton will also attempt to “solve problems” caused by North Korea’s nuclear program. Clinton leaped into the sea from his unmarked, low-flying […]

August 4th, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »

Murderous Oprah forgiven by public, self

Murderous Oprah forgiven by public, self

Oprah Winfrey formally apologized today for her murderous shooting spree at a South Side Chicago nursing home that killed 14 seniors and sent 21 more to hospital. “Caring for seniors can be tedious work for nurses and caregivers,” said the talk show idol, “but this does not excuse my behavior at St. Mark’s Home for […]

July 23rd, 2009 | Posted in Entertainment, Headlines | Read More »